I spot you in the crowd

Tied across your sisters back

Yellow cloth

Hides you from view.

I see your face

You lean against her five-year-old back

Your eyes are shut

Slits

Deep within the darkened sockets

Cheek bones sharp

Emaciated.

You awaken

Big beautiful brown eyes.

You look at me

Confused.

Unconsciously, I step towards you

Drawn to your sweet

Beautiful eyes

Set in a face sad as death

I reach out my hand

And touch your head

You do not move.

Your sister’s mournful face

Turns to me

Her hand outstretched

Holds a card

I read:

Natee Lucia

Birth date blank.

"Bua" I beckon

To loosen the knot

Binding you to her back

Leah takes her MUAC tape

Measures around your left bicep

8 cm

Red

Dangerous.

I hold out my arms

Your sister hands you

Cautiously

I shift you to the scale

5 kg

You do not scream like every other child

You only stare

I hold you in my arms.

I can feel every bone

Beneath the skin that hangs so loosely

Like cloth draped over a tree

Wilted in the drought

Shriveled from malnutrition.

I clutch your brittle legs to my side

Terrified that you will

Fall to dust in my hands

And blow away in the breeze.

You are too scared to struggle

You are too tired

You lay your head,

Bigger than your body,

Against my chest

And exhale a ghost.

Natee Lucia!

I want to cry.